BY LEE PFEIFFER
If you're among the very few who were impressed by John Wayne's performance as Genghis Khan in "The Conqueror", you'll be delighted to know that the obscure 1978 film "The Norseman" has been released on Blu-ray by Kino Lorber in collaboration with Scorpion and it affords an abundance of delights that range from similar historical inaccuracies along with the inventive casting of a leading man in what would appear to be a highly inappropriate role. We speak of Lee Majors- yes, that Lee Majors- who had been enjoying considerable success on the small screen as "The Six-Million Dollar Man". Now, Majors wouldn't be the first actor to come to mind to star in a film about Vikings, but, hey, if you accepted the Duke as Genghis Khan, you'll have no problem with Majors in this particular role. Like many actors who found fame and fortune on the small screen, Majors obviously wished to expand his influence to the silver screen. After all, Tony Curtis had been overcoming being severely miscast for many years and made favorable impressions in "Spartacus" and- wait for it!- "The Vikings", playing heroic slaves in both films despite his undisguised New Yawk accent. Majors, a native of Michigan, attempts the same feat here, but alas, with less successful results. He plays Thorvald (presumably no relation to the Marvel Comics hero Thor, but you get the drift), a deadly earnest Viking warrior who is on a mission of rescue and revenge. Seems his father, King Eurich (Mel Ferrer,) set sail to seek out new lands for conquest and he and his crew haven't been heard from since. Thus,Thorvald and his crew attempt to retrace his route in hopes of finding and rescuing him. When they finally reach their destination, you may be perplexed as to why it looks a great deal like Florida. That's because the film was shot in Florida, despite the fact that Vikings didn't get within thousands of miles of the future Disney World. They are instantly attacked by an Indian tribe, which leads to one of the dullest action scenes in memory. Turns out ol' King Eurich and his not-so-merry men have been held captive by the particularly cruel chief of the tribe, who has systematically blinded them and forced them to work as slaves. With the help of a vivacious tribal maiden (are there any other kind in movies of this type?), Thorvald locates his dad and constructs a "Mission: Impossible"-type plan to free him and escape.
The film was written, produced and directed by Charles B. Pierce, who had gained a good deal of credence through his atmospheric 1972 cult horror films "The Legend of Boggy Creek" and "The Town That Dreaded Sundown", both of which proved to be extremely successful for low-budget independent films. This time around, however, Pierce eschewed the horror film genre that had served him well in favor or making a horrible film, albeit one with plenty of camp appeal and an abundance of unintended knee-slapping dialogue. The first problem is that the viewer can't avoid being distracted by the sight of Vikings cavorting through Floridian terrain. The second problem is Majors in the lead role. As with Duke Wayne's Genghis Khan, he makes no effort to affect an exotic accent and delivers the dialogue in his normal Midwestern accent in a bored, somnambulatory manner, as though he began to have second thoughts about starring in the film the moment the cameras started turning. Among the other victims is the esteemed Cornell Wilde, a fine actor and director, who is reduced to playing Majors' right-hand Viking and shouting out innocuous orders to the crew. Mel Ferrer is made up in a long white wig and beard that seems to be channeling Christopher Lee's future appearances in "The Lord of the Rings" films. Director Charles Pierce cast his son Chuck as Majors' teenage brother, through whose eyes the tale is told. Debutante actress Susie Coelhoe is the helpful maiden Winetta, who gets to dash through the Florida swamps in a sexy one-piece number that seems to be the Viking era equivalent of the mini-skirt centuries before the design was ripped off by those rogues on Carnaby Street. Contemporary American football star Deacon Jones of the Los Angeles Rams doesn't escape unscathed, either. He's bizarrely cast in a nondescript role that includes a single line of dialogue, which unfortunately doesn't explain how his character became history's only African-American Viking. Rounding out the hodgepodge of veteran and novice actors is Jack Elam (!) as a wizened Viking prophet who is shrouded in a hood so that, we are told, his face can never be seen (despite the fact that his face is plainly visible throughout the film.) It should be noted that many of the Viking characters are attired in horned headgear, which actual Vikings did not wear. It seems that director Pierce's historical research didn't extend beyond Hagar the Horrible comic strips. The best news for Lee Majors was that the film never hurt his career, probably because so few people saw it. He went on to star in another hit TV series, "The Fall Guy" with his reputation unscathed.
Although one can be sarcastic about wacky movies such as "The Norseman", it must be said that it's a good thing that companies such as Kino Lorber and Scorpion devote time, energy and resources to keep them in circulation. Even bad films don't deserve the dignity of falling into oblivion and this one is fun to watch, even if for all the wrong reasons. The Blu-ray features a very nice transfer with the trailer and a trailer gallery of other Scorpion releases as the only extras.
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